Like talking about boobs? Then you’ll like talking about bras! OK, sometimes we don’t get the opening right, but surely you’ll forgive us, right? Especially if we show you boobs. Now, we can’t just go out and talk about boobs all the time, even though we’ve mentioned the word quite a bit in this first little paragraph.
So let’s talk about something that we haven’t covered — bras. Lots and lots of bras. How many? Too many — especially if they cover the boobs.
However, bras aren’t just every man’s worst enemy — they are a supporter of all things boobs. In fact, one would say that they support women quite well. Wearing the right bra helps you achieve the proper posture, and that’s always a good thing.
For the guys, it’s just one more thing that leaves a little something to the imagination, and that’s hot — though not necessarily in a Paris Hilton type of way. It’s just something nice to throw in the mix once in a while.
So, let’s get back to the bras, okay? These aren’t just any bras. We were thinking about Lady Gaga when it came to these bras. Of course, Lady Gaga borrows a lot from Madonna, but that doesn’t mean anything either, right?
1. Mm…Chopsticks?
Should sharp objects be allowed near the breasts? The Chopstick Bra is something interesting because it looks so large. We mean, it’s two bowls full of rice. And we mean that literally — those are pretty big bowls of rice. However, one thing that we’re curious about is how these scale in size. Is there a larger version for more full figured women, or is this something that’s more or less one-size-fits-most?
2. Bling, Bling: the Bra Version
Did you ever want to have a glitzy bra? Sure you have…if you’re a woman, that is. OK, if you want to be a guy and wear this sparkly bra, we certainly won’t stop you.
The price? 1.35M, please. There are over 2,500 little diamonds that make up this bra. If your girlfriend happens to be wearing one of these at a party, make sure that you are careful to protect her. This many diamonds means that someone could actually mug her!
3. Need More Bling?
What’s that? 1.35M isn’t good enough for you? You need to seek out more than just the big price? Well, let’s go gold!
This golden bra is 1.9M, which means that you’re definitely going to attract attention, if only from the price tag alone. However, it looks like you have to be fairly small chested in order to fit into this golden bra, which means that if you have a thing for larger busted babes, it’s just not going to work out well for you.
4. Does Bacon Make Everything Better, Really?
Bacon. You like bacon. We like bacon. However, I don’t think that you’re going to really convince your girlfriend to put on a bacon bra. Raw bacon against the skin just feels slimy to us, and we wouldn’t want to put our girlfriends through that. Still, if you’re feeling adventurous, you might want to go to one of those fancy organic meat shops. Hey, if you’re going to ask your girlfriend to wear a bacon bra, it might as well be the best bacon that you can buy, right?
5. Spiky, much?
This bra is plain… if you’re only looking at the color! We think that it could be jazzed up with a more vibrant color than just plain old white. However, if you’re looking for a white bra with a bit of an edge, then this is the perfect bra for you.
Part of us wants to figure out how sharp the little spikes could really be. Would you even want to wear a shirt over this bra? We guess this is one that probably should be saved for the bedroom. Or Lady Gaga. Or both.
6. The Hand Palm Bra — The Classic is Back!
How many times have you seen a magazine and they were talking about a celebrity and how “natural looking” their nude photo was? Usually it’s got them posed with a handbra more times than not. The classic is to actually have a man’s hands over the breasts in question, but hey — you can’t always find a hunky set of hands.
Maybe this is where this bra could step in. Now, when the hands are actually metallic and shiny, they’re just a bit creepy. We’re not trying to judge but um…we’ll pass on this bra too.
So, ladies — is there any bra from this series that you would actually wear? Sound off in the comments, because we would love to hear about it. And uh, in the spirit of the interwebs…pics or it didn’t happen!